Arms of Love

When was the last time you just let everything go? Like, literally everything? I thought I was pretty good at it ... coming home from work and letting work go. Going on a trip and forgetting about all of the stress and pressure that was waiting for me at home. Maintaining friendships in the midst of busy schedules, time zones and changes. But you know what? I've been holding onto all of that. Even when I was convinced I let it go from time to time. When I took time to spend with the Lord, I was still holding onto all of the ... stuff. I let it distract me from giving God my full attention.

Well, last weekend I went to a women's retreat with my church. The theme was "Creating a Sacred Space" and I knew going in to the weekend that we would be talking about putting aside all of our busyness and everything in our lives and making room for the Lord. The problem was, I didn't have time to make time for all of that. My life was too busy. Are you sensing the irony here? By the time I got to the retreat late Friday afternoon, I was ready for some rest. During our first session, our leaders were talking about putting aside everything that is on our minds - everything. We had a "Sabbath" box on the table and we wrote down things that we were going to lay aside for the weekend - work, communication with others, I had quite a list. Then our speaker was talking about finding rest in God. True, quiet rest. She described crawling up into God's lap and letting Him hold us.

I can't remember the last time I crawled into someone's lap and just let them hold me. I pictured that with God. Just sitting there, letting Him rock me, calming me worries and fears, taking all of my stress and throwing it away. Completely letting go of everything. It was amazing. I can't even describe how wonderful it felt to give it all over to the Lord. I guess as a single woman, I feel the need to take care of myself. I can ask for help, but ultimately I feel like I still have to always maintain control. There isn't anyone else around to take care of me. Just me. But you know what? That's not true. I've been lying to myself. My God is here to take over. He wants the control. He wants my worries and fears. He wants all me. He longs to wrap me in His arms of love and rock me. Oh sweet friends, I pray that you can experience that someday. It truly is the sweetest feeling. Now, I just need to remember how to do that every day. To crawl back up in my Father's lap and let him take control.